Fantasia
by Kinomoto Sakura
Summary: "What is wrong to let your grip on reality slip? I don't see why, but perhaps my imagination clouds my judgement." A Naoko one-shot.


  
Disclaimer: I do not own Card Captor Sakura. It is copyrighted by CLAMP, and Kodansha.   
A Naoko one-shot. 

**Fantasia**

Is there something wrong to lose yourself in the world of fantasy? To be given the gift of power, to search for a forgotten artefact and fall in love with a rival, and to have those feelings returned? To think that there is a life after death, and to return for some unaccomplished task? To believe mythical creatures do exist, like the beautiful proud white unicorn, with its fiery mane and its golden horn?

I never thought that there was anything wrong with that. Is there anything wrong with dreaming? Reality can be dull, or perhaps my life is dull in truth. I'm not amazing gifted and rich like Tomoyo, or bright and cheerful like Sakura. I'm not mature and kind like Rika, nor do I stand out like Chiharu does. I am not very athletic though I am in the cheerleading club. I really don't like sports that much honestly. Perhaps the reason I joined the cheerleading club was so that I could be with my friends. I am usually quiet, and I bury myself away in the library in my free time. It is nice to imagine that I am very special, that I am not plain. Who am I? I am Yanagisawa Naoko, commonly known as "the girl who loves ghost stories." Honestly I don't mind that title, because it is what I am. Reading is always so enjoyable for me, to be able to walk into someone else's world for a few hours and explore the possibilities. Why is it wrong to let your grip on reality slip? I don't see why, but perhaps my imagination clouds my judgement.

I am in the library right now. It smells a bit musty, and it is lighted by the fixtures above, curtains drawn so that there will be no distracting movements. It is insulated well, as I cannot hear outside, the chattering and gossip of people my age. The walls are a yellowing white, and the shelves are a dull mahogany, most of its varnish thinned away. I lovingly walk pass the shelves and my fingers lightly graze the titles of the books. I know them well, "The Time Machine", by HG Wells, "The Lord of the Rings" by JRR Tolkien, and various folklore and fairytales. Spotting an old favourite, my fingers dance up the spine as I reach to pull it out. I support the book by placing the spine on my left palm, and use my right to navigate through the yellowed pages carefully, and I find the story that I wish to read. 

I walk over to one of the tables that the library provides, occasionally glancing upwards for any obstructions, reading over lines that are almost ingrained in my memory. I pull out a wooden chair and seat myself. I do not mind it's hardness, I'm so used to it anyway. I place my book on the table and I continue to read. After a few moments of silence, except for the sound of a page turning, and dutiful reading, I close the book shut with a smile. What is this story you may ask?

It is "Yuki-onna", the story of the Snow Woman who killed men in the cold. She met a young man she was supposed to kill but became reluctant to and spared him on the promise that he would speak no word of their meeting. Later she disguised as a human and became his wife. But he broke his promise and she left him, on a vow that if her children ever complained of him, she would kill him on the next cold night. 

I like this story. I don't know why but I find it fascinating. I'm not saying that I am bitter. I believe that there is love out there. I will be patient though, until a person I admire comes to me like in a fairytale. But I know that there is no such thing as perfect love. Perhaps "Yuki-onna" reflects on that, which makes me like it so.

"Naoko-chan, want to eat lunch with us?" asks a cheerful voice behind me. I turn and smile.   
"Of course, Sakura-chan," I answer as I stand up, taking the book with me. As we pass the row of shelves, I slip the book into its spot, to be there until another person fancies it.

The bright light outside almost blinds me as I exit from my sanctuary. I step down from the library's stone steps and I see Chiharu waving at me. Everyone is seated on the benches, under the trees for shade, as the summer sun shines relentlessly down upon us. 

I walk while Sakura happily runs over, displaying her energetic personality. Rika motions me to sit beside her and I comply. Taking out my bento, I can't help but notice the people around me. Li-kun is blushing wildly as Sakura attempts to feed him a portion of her own lunch. Tomoyo is filming the two, happily commenting how cute it is, her eyes giving a strange shine. Chiharu had given up on feeding Yamazaki-kun a piece of fried squid and is beating him repeatedly on the head with the other end of her chopsticks. Yamazaki-kun himself is apologizing repeatedly for saying how squid was really aliens that descended from the sky and got trapped inside water. Rika is eating her own lunch, and I can't help but notice her ring glinting as she moves her chopsticks for more rice. 

Almost everyone has someone. Tomoyo may be by herself but I sense contentment from her. Sakura and Li-kun are happy, especially after their reunion in junior high. Chiharu and Yamazaki-kun are happy, despite all the lies and beatings. Someone had given Rika that ring, and I'm sure someday she'll tell us who. But I am not worried about being lonely. I'm sure that someday I can find someone. Till then, I'll just read my books for company.

Authors Notes: I'm just taking a small break from Altered World. By Care's post on the forum, and her ideas, my mind started to spin and I wanted to try one based on her theory. Well Care, hopefully I answered your challenged well.   
Altered World shall be updated as soon, just let me finish my physics lab.


End file.
